where's he hiding now?

I don't know where he is. well, the area in general, I do know. from the telly. the news. the kind where ya think "for fuck's sake, that's horrible" and you wanna run to the fridge and make those poor little kids something to eat and give them all your blankets. where ya run the figures of your bank statements in your head again to see if you can afford to adopt them all.

yeah, I know, I'm a damn egocentric... but I start to miss him again, I do.

yeah great, there we have it...

I miss him. loads. and I shouldn't. he ain't around now. he hasn't been in years... and he won't be for months to come... and even when/if he will be, noone knows for what reason. or maybe he knows... on the other hand, maybe he doesn't, either.

I shouldn't miss him. that doesn't make things easier or better for me. I can't help it, the... addiction, if you will... has come back.

I'm pathetic. just 'coz he said I-love-you all those years ago, doesn't mean he'll say - or mean it - again. admit it, you're just asking for trouble!