playing pretend

sure, what is shown on the telly isn't reality. but then, there's some stories you see and you feel better. lorelei gets luke (gilmore girls), jamie and paul are kinda weird but lovely (mad about you) and every once in a while there's a scene in some movie and it's so real you want to be there. not inside the movie, mind... but in that situation.

and sometimes you dream, and the dream is so sweet, so breathtaking, you don't want to wake up and when ya finally do (shame, really), you still have that smile on your face. this happened to me earlier this morning, when I woke up the first time. I dreamed I had an e-mail from goldeneye, and lots of it was in my mothertongue (he used to speak some when he still lived here) and he had put some pics in it and while I read that note in my dream, I heard his voice reading it aloud and thinking of that now brings tears to my eyes.

then I woke up. I instantly knew it had just been a dream, but the hope was back. I hoped so much, I'd get to office, and there'd be a note from him in reality. I kept telling myself there wouldn't be, it had just been a dream. why am I still a bit disappointed there really was no message?


because I'm an idiot, that's why.


20 minutes later, this mate of mine whom I've known for about 2 years now tried to cheer me up. he didn't know what was up, but he cheered me up big time. we talked throughout the day and now I know he fancies me. good thing too, us living half a planet apart. I really know how to choose a man...

well done, doll.