running with knives

there's this image of a person with an angel and a demon sitting on each shoulder. having a chat, everyone trying to get his opinion across. shouting match going on...
I find that amusing, but to me, it feels like there's the reckless optimistic voice and the tired-of-life jaded depressed one having a constant conversation. they get really loud when the jaded depressed one suggests to ram a knife down my arms, just above the wrist. and reckless optimistic sighs and leads JD away for a pint and a bit of telly.

I want a pacifier. ummm.. a cigarette. real bad. I need something to relax my mind, get other thoughts in. I need a hug and be told I'm loved and all will be well.

the proverbial being hit by a meteor...