rain questions

is it the rain that's making me so melancholy? what's so special about a sunday that it opens up old wounds? why do I always already see the end about stuff even before it's had a chance to even happen? how could the mourning ever stop if I never let it go away and pass? is this my way to cope with loss? even though there might still be a chance of change of the outcome? where's the garderobiére that'll let me check in my pain for a couple of hours while my mind goes partying. I promise I'll pick it back up.

and what's the goddamn point in giving me his new mobile number when his phone is constantly switched off? mindgames? or just zero network connection?

I thought I was over this years ago. I can't continue scratching those scars and reopen them all the time. am I such a sucker for punishment that I'd give anything, any pain there'll be (and I already know there will be hell to pay for me when this is over) to get another week, or at least another day... or a mere couple of hours?

rain, at least wash my questions away and give me a rest from it all.