jus' chillin'

2 weeks 2 days vacation. 4 days spent on various airports and one of the greatest city in europe, with a real good friend.... 2 full weeks spent at home, with myself. my plan had been to do as little as possible, and that's exactly what I'm doing. a huge stack of books, but my progress into those isn't as fast as anticipated... but hey!

how can I explain how it feels like to be able to do nothing much at all.. and that for 2 weeks? how can I make it clear how I'm not bored at all, all alone with myself? how can this 2-week-date with myself make me feel so centred, so self-assured, so soothed?

my feeling of being burned out and tired of life is decreasing with every passing hour... I'm calm and smiling quietly at myself whenever I pass a mirror in my house or a window on the street. I'm here! I'm not going anywhere! I don't have to be anywhere at a certain time, I don't have to spend time on other people's petty shite. I'm not exhausted anymore...

I'm filling myself up with silence and there have been whole days where I didn't speak a word, just reading and watching telly and being me. the real me. the me that needed rest so badly and now I'm giving myself what I needed for so many months.

apparently the sadness has taken a time-out as well.. probably tired of me.

yep, there's still problems. yes, there's still sorrows lurking around the corner, waiting to be solved. I just don't have any time for that shite right now.

I'm busy with myself.